


102 Direwolves

by TooManyGaysTooLittleTime



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire & Related Fandoms, A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: 102 Dalmatians AU, Cersei as Cruella de Vil, Jaime as LePelt, M/M, Robb Stark as Chloe, Robert as Alonzo, Theon as Kevin, anyway it’s basically all just cheesy romance, basically a quarantine pick-me-up, if those tags make no sense to you don’t worry, maybe i should stop tagging now, the plot is just as crack as the first film and the romance is just as cheesy, there is literally nothing serious about this, they’re only there for people who have watched the movie
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-07
Updated: 2020-06-15
Packaged: 2021-03-04 04:53:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,747
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24587890
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TooManyGaysTooLittleTime/pseuds/TooManyGaysTooLittleTime
Summary: A Theon/Robb 102 Dalmatians AU. You don’t have to have watched the film to read this, it’s just here as cheesy and fluffy romance.currently on hiatus, unsure when it will be picked up again! expect longer chapters & extra content when it does resume.
Relationships: Theon Greyjoy/Robb Stark
Comments: 6
Kudos: 6





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This first chapter is just a prologue, and doesn’t have Robb or theon in it, but still do read it as it’s useful for the “plot”

The test subjects were behind metal doors, a metal letterbox the only way to see into them. Doctor Moelle moves along them, sliding open the letterboxes and examining his subjects. 

  
First door. The metal slides aside to reveal a large ginger cat, a bird curled up beside it happily. 

Second door. Peering through the slot, the doctor’s eyes find a dog and a cat. Once again neither is perturbed by the presence of the other beside them. 

Third door, and the one the doctor is especially proud of. Through the opening, there is a woman, dressed entirely in black and white, with dogs of every provenance all over her. Cersei Lannister laughs joyfully, happily. 

“Impressive,” the other doctor observes as they walk back through the hallway. “I have a question, though. This treatment—is there any side-effects?”

“There is, one.” The doctor switches on the TV to BBC news. A grainy image of Big Ben appears on the screen, and through the speakers Big Ben starts to chime, the loud peals of the bell echoing through the hallway. 

Behind the first door, there is the sound of claws and frightened squawking. Behind the second, the unmistakable noise of growls. And behind the third… 

* * *

“Cersei Lannister.” 

“Yes?” Cersei is trembling slightly as she looks up into the eyes of Judge Mace Tyrell. Her black-gloved hands are clasped on her chest, and her eyes are beseeching. 

“You are hereby released from prison—” Cersei lets out a small, happy gasp—“on the condition that you do not repeatedly offend. If you do, you will be faced with six months’ community services, and all of your money shall be donated to dog shelters in the North Borough of King's Landing.” 

A grin breaks out across Cersei’s face, though whether it is genuinely happy or something else, Mace cannot discern. She says “Oh, thank you, thank you so much,” as she is escorted out of the courtroom, even turning to her escort to thank them. Mace sighs and rubs his forehead. 

Outside the courthouse, Cersei Lannister is mobbed by reporters, cameras flashing in her face. She smiles gaily as she walks to her car, Robert waiting outside with a box in his arms, and kisses him on the cheek when she gets there. 

“Cersei, I have a gift for you,” Robert says, lifting the lid on the (pink, ribbonned) box to reveal—

“A  _ puppy _ ! Ahh—” Cersei scoops the small dog into her arms and kisses its head, while several of the reporters look on, bemused. She gets in the (already opened) car door, fussing over the dog. 

Robert Baratheon gets in the other side, turns the key, and the car starts up. In a matter of moments, Cersei Lannister is away from court and away from prison. Free, and going to do… what? 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Second Chance Dog Shelter is in trouble, Grey Wind gets to be a father, and Robb is too tired for all of this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this will probably be longer than expected but none of us mind at all. do we? no. 
> 
> updates will be a bit more sporadic depending on the status of all my other fics but i promise will get through this. i have an actual plot this time, for one!
> 
> anyway enjoy some fluff although how fluffy some of it is... is questionable

“Asha Greyjoy,” Robb says, his hands clasped on his desk. “where’s your benefits cheque?” 

The woman in front of him immediately starts rifling through the pockets of her waterproof, and Robb suddenly finds his desk covered in various objects that range from slightly odd to just straight-up weird. Chewing gum. A rubber duck. Bent and folded photos. Plastic monkeys. 

Finally, after a pack of gummy worms lands on Robb’s papers, Asha takes out a soaking wet and wrinkled benefits cheque. Robb sighs internally as he flattens it out. 

“It’s all in order,” he says, handing the soggy paper back over to Asha. As she starts picking up all her stuff from his desk, one of the photos catches his eye. “Is this where you work?” he asks, examining the image. It shows Asha and another man, surrounded by dogs of all kinds, in front of what seems to be a beaten-down fair, with a sign that says  _ Second Chance Dog Rescue _ . 

“Yeah, it is,” Asha says, chewing gum in her mouth now. She points at the man. “That’s my brother, Theon. He runs the place.”

Robb stares at the guy. In the picture, he looks cheerful, several leashes at his wrist. He’s wearing shorts and a parka, and as Robb looks—yes, he can see the resemblance to the woman in front of him. 

Robb gives the picture back to Asha. “Have a nice day,” he says, and she stands up and walks out of his office, still chewing gum. 

* * *

Inside Second Chance Dog Rescue, Theon is on his hands and knees, a rope clenched between his teeth. The dog opposite him has the other end of the rope in his mouth, and slobber drips from his muzzle. 

“ _ Come on, Theon, pull harder! _ ” Arryn calls from his perch on high. “ _ Oh, for Pete’s sake, it’s impossible for you humans to play tug-of-war against dogs! _ ”

Theon feels a tug at the other end of the rope, and pulls back, clenching it between his teeth. His muscles strain as he tries to pull it towards him—

Boyd shakes his head, and spittle flies into Theon’s face. He tries to wipe it off with a dirty hand, then grits his teeth and slowly stands up, the rope still in his mouth. The dog’s forelegs begin to lift off the ground, his hind legs begin to skid—

“ _ Cheat! Cheat! Get him, boys! _ ” Arryn’s words cause a cacophony of barking, and claws suddenly begin to dig into his ankles, and another dog starts to roll lumps of charcoal at Theon’s feet. 

“ _ Let’s get ready to tumble! _ ” Arryn cries joyously, and Theon slips to the floor and falls into an ageing cat’s head from an abandoned fair. Its jaws snap shut over him, and the dogs bark happily. 

Asha pushes open the door, and leans back against it as Theon stands up. “ _ Not fair _ , guys,” he sighs. “I rescue you, and this is how you repay me?” The dogs’ heads droop, chastened. 

“How many times you gonna fall for that one?” Asha quips as she opens the cat’s jaws to let Theon out. Ducking underneath the plastic teeth, Theon grimaces. 

“Too many, it seems.” 

“Managed to get another week out of my probation officer. Think he might fancy me.”

Asha slides the bag on her shoulder to the floor and pulls it open. Arryn sees what’s inside first, and immediately shrieks “ _ Grub time! _ ”

The dogs move in a great wave of fur, swarming over to their dishes and then congealing into a queue. 

“How are you doing with your probation,” Theon whispers, “not—doing anything like that?” 

“Who do you take me for?” Asha says. “No, Theon. I’m not.”

“C’mon,” Theon says to the first dog, coaxing him forwards and piling the food into his bowl. He trots away. “Okay, who’s next?” 

Arryn is the last one, holding his bowl in his beak. Theon and Asha share a smirk. 

Asha places Arryn’s bowl atop the birdhouse, and Theon turns to Arryn and smiles. “Come on, Arryn, you can fly up there and get it!”

Arryn puffs out his feathers self-importantly, then backs up and begins to run. Theon crosses his fingers that today will be the day—

“ _ I’m a dog, what are you thinking, I can’t fly up there! _ ” Arryn squawks, and Theon and Asha sigh. Asha takes down the bowl, fills it up with food, and gives it to Arryn resignedly. 

“Save some for tomorrow,” Theon turns to Asha. “Don’t know if we’ll have enough money for a fresh bag.” 

“Alannys always said that when we need help, help comes knocking,” Asha observes drily, but the portions grow steadily smaller, all the same. 

Three raps on the door shock them both, and Theon looks at Asha, gaping. “When we need help, help comes knocking!” He runs to get the door. 

Opening it, however, Theon is nearly hit over the head with a hammer. He ducks back and then sees what is being nailed to his door. 

“Eviction notice? But you said—”

“Shouldn’t always believe what people say,” the man says with a smirk. Theon could hit him over the head with his own hammer right now. Instead, he settles for emotional appeal, gesturing at the dogs currently digging into their meagre portion of food.

“You can’t just evict these dogs! They need homes!”

Attracted by the commotion, Arryn waddles over, cawing out growls. Theon tries to keep away his laughter as the bird starts pecking at the property agent’s very fancy shoes, probably ruining them. Despite the threat to his shoes, the man chuckles. 

As if in response to the man’s amusement, Arryn starts barking more and more, and pecking harder and harder. The dogs behind bark as the man slowly starts to realise that Arryn isn’t merely being funny, but seriously attempting to run him off Second Chance. And it’s working—the man overbalances and falls backwards, managing to barely keep his dignity intact as he staggers away. 

He leaves, sputtering something about bringing more people next time. Theon slams the door shut, irritated, and Arryn looks out of the flap, calling “Don’t come back here again!”

Theon leans against the door, wondering how the hell he’s going to get out of this situation. He straightens his posture and puts on a brave face as he turns to Asha and the dogs.

“We’re going to get through this. It’s alright. Go back to eating,” he says, although Asha’s eyes on him see through his white lies. 

* * *

Grey Wind and Robb watch Lady and her pups, leaning into the cozy atmosphere of the nest of blankets. Robb notices that Grey Wind’s eyes are full of pride as he watches Lady, who is tired but still awake. 

Lady nuzzles one of her pups, and Robb runs a finger along Grey Wind’s back. He watches as Grey Wind leans forward to nuzzle Lady’s cheek, and his heart grows fonder of the two of them. 

Robb laughs when he sees that one of the pups’ eyes are already open, just as Ghost’s had been when they had first seen him. This direwolf’s eyes are silver, and Robb sees himself reflected in them. Careful with the small, squirming bundle of fur, Robb puts it back with the rest of its litter. 

“I think I’m going to call that one Silver,” Robb declares to Grey Wind and Lady, stroking the newly named Silver’s back. 

Grey Wind barks his agreement.

Robb strokes Lady’s head one last time. “Come on, Grey Wind. You may be the father, but the mother needs a rest.” He gets up and shuts the doors to the dog bed, Grey Wind remaining until the doors close. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> note: yes, grey wind and lady did have pups. no, i do not condone incest. dogs will happily mate with other dogs in their own litter and have pups - humans (hopefully) less so. 
> 
> kudos and comments are basically rocket fuel for an author’s brain!

**Author's Note:**

> Next chapter: meet Robb and the direwolf OC!


End file.
